when u make a joke and the whole class laughs
Because my cousin shared 3 rape experiences she had
And on all three occasions
She was wearing sweats and was brutally beaten
So there goes your excuse
That my tight dress was asking for it
It might have escaped your attention,
But I don’t wake up in the mornings,
And put on a skirt thinking,
Will this get me raped?
I don’t put on a tank top hoping,
Maybe this one will.
Because in school, they teach us that our bodies are offensive.
They pull us from classrooms
Demanding if we have longer shorts,
Or even a sweater,
Reminding us that the boys are distracted,
That the boys go wild for a peeking shoulder,
Or the sight of a sun burned thigh,
Because their education is more important than ours.
Because white men in pressed suits,
Expensive watches hanging from their wrists,
Red faces glinting with arrogance,
Have more say over my body than I do.
Because those same men,
Quoting the Bible and fake statistics,
Have never shed blood,
As a twisted sacrifice for being a woman.
Because those same men,
Have never walked the streets,
Fearing for their lives,
Clinging to keys between their fingers like a lifeline
With pepper spray in their bags,
Ready for someone to feel entitled to their body.
Because when a man says no to us,
It is a fault in OUR character.
It is because we are not
Thin, tan, or perky enough for HIM.
Because when WE say no to a man,
Its still a fault in OUR character,
We are the cold, ruthless bitch,
Saying no to the nice guy,
Who offered to buy us a drink,
And Who complimented our hair.
Because a UCSB entitled nine-teen year old boy,
Can record a video
Of his plans to shoot down all the
“Blond bimbos who denied him his right,”
And then do so,
Only to have his actions excused by the media,
Claiming he was depressed,
Instead of admitting that male entitlement is dangerous.
Because I am done being silenced
And I am done being polite.
I am done sitting by
As a country hypocritically cries
Equality and justice
But doesn’t have equal pay
Lets men make decisions for a woman’s body
And blames the victim for the actions of a rapist.
Because our NO won’t be enough one day.
Because I wasn’t asking for it.
Because “Boys Will Be Boys,” is still an excuse
Because “Not All Men Are Like That,” is still a defense.
Because enough blood has been spilled.
Because I am sixteen years old, and I am so afraid, when I shouldn’t have to be.
As it happens I have too many posts to delete so I’m giving up on that and I’ll just continue as normal. I’m probably gonna post a load of personal posts from now on. I don’t know if anybody actually cares but it just helps to get my thoughts out there sometimes.
So I moved into university yesterday after a glorious week long holiday in Fuerteventura where the weather was great and there was a really nice, chilled atmosphere. I’m all unpacked and I went out last night with people which was fun although it was incredibly busy. I’m not used to being in crowds as big as that so it was pretty intimidating but I was a little drunk so it could have been worse. I slept in today and went for a walk to the campus to get my ID card and then wandered Leeds for a while. The city is huge! I’ve been several times before but I saw so much more of it today.
It’s kinda lonely if I’m honest. Everyone is really nice and I know that they’re in the same boat as me but it’s difficult to click with people. There are already these cliques of people forming within the student halls and I feel out of place. I’ve found a few cool people that I get on with well but I’m hoping when my course starts I’ll be less nervous and able to make friends. I feel this enormous pressure to go out and socialise but I feel so awkward all the time and I don’t know how to talk to people.
Other than being a bit socially awkward, I’m happy to be here. My room is great and the university itself looks amazing. Everyone’s off to this event tonight but I don’t have a ticket for it and I don’t know what else is on. I’m gonna stay in and watch Netflix and acclimatise a bit more. I have to be at university for 9am tomorrow and it’s a half an hour walk so I have to be up pretty early for that. I haven’t been here that long so I’m sure I’ll start to feel better once the course starts and I meet other people properly.